I just bought this.

Source

I love puns and balding Canadians.

Colin: “Good evening and welcome to the 6 o’clock news. I’m your anchor, Oswald Thatendswald. Our top story today, convicted hitman, Jimmy ‘Two Shoes’ McClardy confessed today that he was hired to beat and attack a cow to death in a rice field using only two small porcelain figures. At least we’ll admit this may be the first known case of a knick knack paddy whack.”